| How to Break
Up a Couple - SURELY THEY DON'T DESERVE THEM!
From
http://www.campusnut.com/article.cfm?
article_id=1000&atype=dating_tips
" Home > Dating Tips > How to
Break Up a Couple
How to Break Up a
Couple
How to Break Up a
Couple
Recently, I told my loyal fans how
to break up with a girl. Now I will tell you how to break up a couple. Let's
say that you have your eye on a certain Monica, Rita, or any of the girls
from Mambo Number 5. However, she won't do the horizontal mambo with you
because she is taken. Yup, she is dating some loser when she should be dating
you. What is your recourse? You can either a) go after someone else, or b)
break them up. Option A is safer and more gentlemanly, but Option B is more
fun. When you are faced with this dilemma, ask yourself, "WWASD? What would
Alan Smithee Do?" Okay, now that we have decided to break up the happy couple,
here is a surefire trick to make her think that knight is wearing a rusty
armor.
Step One: Highlight Joe Schmoe's
shortcomings.
Step Two: Operation Tokyo
Rose
Step Three: Have Her Imagine You as
Her Boyfriend
Step Four: Win Over Her
Friends
Step Five: Go For the
Kill"
From http://forums.yellowworld.org/
archive/index.php/t-6246.html
" Breaking Up Another
Couple
Q. ....there's this girl who you think
really digs you. She's doing okay with her boyfriend but they're having problems.
They're now at "ground zero" due to long distance woes. After 5 years of
relative happiness, they're formally back at the state they were at when
they started dating as far as attachment and commitment
go.
How do you think you can break that
up?
A. Ooooh, I would stay out of it and
let them break up on their own first. That sounds really complicated and
something you'll... oops, YOUR FRIEND will regret later
on.
A. My personal advice is, don't bother,
unless you are only looking for a brief fling. It will be enjoyable but she
will resent you afterwards, use the fact that you broke her up with her boyfriend
to mentally rationalize her own position in whatever conflict she has with
you. Also you'll probably become persona non grata around many of her friends
(obviously in addition to most of her boyfriend's
friends).
But in actuality it's disturbingly
easy. Shouldn't require any special kind of moves, besides not talking trash
about her current boyfriend and deliberately promoting
ambiguity.
A. It's not something that's going
to happen. I don't think my friend could drive himself to do it. But we were
discussing it. I just wondered how you actually steal someone away from another
person without being grotesquely obvious about it. I would think that the
moves would be more of a turnoff to someone who was unhappy but still
committed.
A. people can be more perceptive then
you think sometimes... just let it fall apart on its own accord and try to
genuinely give good advice to her about the relationship ...when it falls
apart(and it will) you will come out looking like the good guy. but by then
I lost interest.
A. You play yourself against the other
guy. And for the time being - say anything she wants to hear, be the guy
she wants you to be . . . etc etc etc. After you get her . . .well then,
hey! Congratulations! Have fun!
A. Stay out of it, The only thing
you can do is be friends with her and see what happens. I had my last gf
stolen away from me like that and it killed me, Theres no way I'd ever do
it to somebody else.
A. who ever is the better man gets
the girl. so woo her. and be all understanding and shit. and pretend that
you actually listen. once you steal her, i hope you/your friend will realize
that she's a tramp, and she'll dump you/your friend for the next better
man.
A. Well in my experience, girls
will never break up with someone until it is a sure shot deal that they are
with someone else. IF you really really want her to break up with this guy
then you have to show her that you obviously like her. But I would reccomend
against this, because after 5 years she has a lot of drama stopped up inside
her.
A. 5 years eh? I would say, just give
her what she wants. Listening, attention, and when she mentions the other
guy, say you can't understand why he isn't there for her, etc, etc. Then
do small things for her, like paying for a dinner once in a while for her...
(not all the time), or small gifts like... if she mentions she likes some
movie, buy the movie for her, etc, etc.
Work this for about a month or so,
and then see if she is responsive to your moves. Then work on gaining her
trust, by telling her so-called "secret" things about yourself. Work that
up, and then embarassing moments, etc, etc. Establish a "connection" with
her, and say stuff like... "You and I think so much alike. You're unique.
I wish more people were like you, blah, blah, blah".
Then get her drunk, and let her advance
to you. When she kisses you or you both make-out, avoid getting in her pants.
When she's sober, tell her that you were tempted, but you wouldn't want to
violate her rights, etc, etc. Then say some psycho-babble about how subconciously
over the last month, she's connected with you, and you feel close to her,
and she wouldn't have allowed herself to connect with you, blah blah
blah.
After that stage, you make a commitment
to talk to her day and night. Then ask her what she truly feels inside. Then
eventually, if you happen to be the nicer guy, and her jerk boyfriend is
still treating her like shit, ask her why she still stays with the guy. Then
if she says shit like.. "oh cuz I love him" you can accuse her of being scared
of a change in her life. She doesn't love him. She only is accustomed to
being treated like shit, and the goddess that she is doesn't need crap like
that, blah blah blah. Eventually screw with the girl's mind enough, and then
you got her."
From http://answers.yahoo.com/question
/index?qid=20060709122006AAGLmXr
"Q. How to break up a
couple?
A. sleep with one of them. j/k. why
would you want to break up a couple?
A. i think its bad to really break
up a couple's relationship. In one case it would end up (if you do manage
to break a couple up) you'll be beaten up. And that wouldn't do too well
with you would it....
Say for example someone tried to break
your relationship with girl/boy what would you do or how would you feel...
I guess I'll leave the decision making up to you"
From hhttp://www.carillon.uregina.ca
/12.01.05/comm1.html
" The Carillon tells me how: to break
up a couple
A random stranger asks: How do I break
up my crush and his girlfriend? Well, random stranger, we’re here to
answer the questions that you gotsta know.
Step one: Recon. Well, if you are
going to fight a battle, you might as well know your enemy. Study them and
learn the innermost workings of their minds. My best advice is to dress up
like a blue recycle bin and stalk them. They will never catch on because
those bins are plentiful.
Step two: Introductions. This
doesn’t need to be formal. Simply walk up to your opponent, slap them
in the face with a glove and challenge them to a dual. By being upfront with
them, this will most definitely, psychologically, freak them
out.
Step three: Trip to the bookstore.
In order to successfully pull off this caper, you are going to need to do
some extra credit readings. Head towards the psychology section, check out
Brainwashing for Dummies or something resembling that. Let the mind games
begin.
Step four: Training. You are about
to go into psychological, and maybe even physical, battle with a person that
just so happened to get there first. You need to get amped, and by amped
I mean you need to consume a couple cans of Rockstar. Now that you have your
dietary needs met, its time to hire a trainer. Go for the burley-angry-Clint
Eastwood-misunderstood type trainer and stay away from the
sweet-innocent-working-at-Al’s-Mr. Miyagi type trainers. While they
may be able to make you a smoothie or trim a bonsai tree, they will not help
you in the long run.
Step five: Home court. In order to
win your battle, I suggest that you attempt to pick a place in which you
will have the home-team advantage in your quest. Possible places include,
Maury, parking lots and back alleys, or places with video cameras or witnesses
to make sure that everyone can see that they attacked
you.
Step six: Confrontation. Have at it,
but try and make them hit you first. This leads to a) them looking like assholes
in front of your crush (and really, they never knew it would be like this
when they started dating them) and b) you get to press charges. Oh yeah,
salt in the wounds. If this doesn’t work, and you’ve got to attack
first, go for the ribs. Don’t ask, just do.
Step seven: Losing. If you’ve
lost in a blaze of glory, and honestly, you probably have, there is no need
to be disheartened. You have learned a little about yourself and also
psychological intimidation. In all honesty, they may very well have not been
worth fighting for in the first place. I hear they kick kittens. Who wants
that shit?"
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From http://trends.newsforge.com/
comments.pl?cid=96227&sid=39443
"Yes I hadn't thought of that analogy.
In this analogy then an author should be able to patent a plot device. Eg.
Guy#1 meets Girl. Gut#2 is jelouse. Guy#2 tells Girl lies about Guy#1. Girl
breakes up with Guy#1. Patent# 8783674 - a patent on how to break up a couple
in a literary novel. Then no other novels may use this particular plot thread
without a license!"
From http://forums.plentyoffish.com
/datingPosts2694657.aspx
"Q. How do you get a cute girl to
dump her bf?
Most(probably all) of the cute girls
my age in my town are taken and have boyfriends. Is there any way to get
a cute girl I like to dump her boyfriend? And please don't give me the "be
friends first" comment. It does not work. I read too many cases on here about
the failure rate of that dilemma.
A. having been on the recieving end
of that...i would just say move on to one without a partner
already
A. how can you expect a serious
relationship if there is nuthing to build on? friends may not work but imo
I think it would work better than anything else if you are looking for a
serious relationship.
A. Are you already friends with this
girl anyway?? Maybe that's all she's wanting from you.. if she wanted you
as her boyfriend.. she would leave her current boyfriend... Just keep fishing..
you'll find someone you click with soon enough
A. You can't, not if he's cooler than
you. And don't even think of badmouthing him to her, it will be transparent
and make it even more difficult for you.
Best thing to do is stop waiting for
opportunities to open up. Go out and make your own, with girls that don't
have boyfriends.
A. Getting her to break up with her
BF is not the way to go. Even if she does, what makes you think she'll want
to be with you? Let's say you do make her break up and somehow you get together
with her, but since they didn't break up on their own she might have feelings
for him and dump you to get back with him. Now that would hurt a
lot.
A. Don't be so dam selfish!!! How
would you like it if some A-hole tryed to take a (cute) girlfriend away from
you? If you had one!! Go to the next town if you must, but don't mess with
other people's relationships!! It's an ignorant, lousy thing to do!! Get
your own life and leave other people's alone!!!
A. Why would you want to do this?
It would cause you many more problems than it would solve. Why would you
want a girl who would dump her man for another one? Girls like that are low
quality and not worth the extra work. Trust me on this one. You are better
off waiting until the guy screws up on his own.. then you can be there to
catch her fall. (thats a whole different problem)
A. The guy between a breakup and the
next boyfriend almost always never lasts.. from my
experience.
Plus, what if.. big IF.. after she
breaks up with her current b/f because of you.. she begins to resent you
for breaking up what could have been a good relationship for
her.
And would you really want to be with
a woman who breaks up with her current b/f to be with someone else.. what
if you're on the receiving end one day.. doesn't feel too
nice."
From
http://www.everythingunderthemoon.net/
spells/break-up-a-couple-2.htm
"Spell to Break up a
Couple
You need a piece of black yarn at
least 12 inches long. At midnight light a candle and tie nine separate knots
one inch apart. Each time you tie a knot, do it with anger thinking of how
they will hate each other and want to break up! Say these words each time
you tie a knot.
"Take this couple that I see
Love is gone, unhappy be
Knots of discord, knots of hate
Soon to part is their fate
With this spell I know I've won
I curse their love to come undone!"
Take and put it some where in your
dresser drawer where you will see it every time you open it. This way every
time you see it you can visualize the couple breaking up. When the spell
has worked, you may throw it away, but do not untie the knots!"
***
If all else fails, you can visit
How to Get The Attention of a Secret
Crush
***
Please
leave your comments, suggestions, and advice regarding how to break up a
couple:
~~~~~
Tigress Luv, The Break Up Guru, is the author
of How to Get Over a Breakup, an instantly
available online webBook, downloadable ebook, and website designed to help
you understand and heal from a broken heart, and How
to STOP Your Breakup, an instantly available webBook, downloadable
ebook, and website designed to help you STOP or reverse your breakup and
get your ex back. Both are available on this site and are free when you
join our
community.
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